Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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