four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize
