Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
