What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I am mentally ready for anal.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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