Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
