how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
