It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
