i don't plan on having that self control this summer
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
