Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
