You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
