yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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