Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
