Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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