Farmville is her only friend.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
