I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Randomize