I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
