five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
