I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
