I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He better not be in your backpack
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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