Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
When did angry sex become our thing?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
