can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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