Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
