i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Randomize
