you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
