Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
