You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
