he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
