id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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