I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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