K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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