you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
