I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
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