I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
