I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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