I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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