whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize