its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
