New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
