in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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