..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
