Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
