Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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