am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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