that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
