All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
