Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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