How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize
