Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
