She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
