Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize
