Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize